I think I've cried all the tears available in my body. I was up the whole night not being able to sleep and everytime I thought about him, I just teared up and cried. Not as hysterically as I did to SJ but just cried silently. Today, I went to college and the first thing I did was hug RayRay who had no idea what happened. And when he found out he gave me a big bear hug. Thanks Ray! And I tried to hide my feelings and I tried really hard to fight back tears. Chris says I shouldn't hide my feelings. She says I'll only feel worse. But I can't bear to let everybody know how I feel. I don't wanna be all moody to everybody just because of this. Eventhough, I was a little moody today. When we were eating in Waffle World, I told Nat I took a picture with him and she wanted to see it. When I showed it to her I think I nearly bawled there in Waffle World. Thank God I have alot of practice in holding in tears.
Thanks SJ, Chris, Nat, RayRay, Claireeey, Masayo, Steph jie, Ame jie and Daniel for listening to me cry and emo.
Thanks Chris for calling. Thanks Masayo for messaging. Thanks SJ for always changing the subject and telling me the about the weird things you've done so far.
It's gonna take me awhile to get over it.
I do take longer to get over things compared to other people. It's just that when I like somebody, I fall really hard and it's very hard to pick myself up after that. And with this guy, let's just say I've never fallen so hard for anybody before. Nat and RayRay are trying to get me a rebound guy. -.- I would never ever get a rebound guy. Sheesh. Unless it's that hot Italian restaurant owner. That one has a fine bum, I tell you. But thinking about him strutting around in his apron is still not making me feel better.
So many things remind me of him now. Everywhere I go to there is something that'll remind me of him. It's depressing. And what's worse, my pillow still has his smell in one corner thanks to my hair. I accidently turned over unto that corner and the waterworks were loose again. I'm trying really hard to forget it. I'm trying very hard.
Tomorrow, I'm going for lunch with SJ and Chris. I hope I don't cry. The problem is, I'm more open with my feelings to the two of them (since they're my two bestest friends) and I swear I would cry.
I also swear I miss him.
